Happy Friday,
Normally, I write these on the night before. However, if I'm honest, I almost didn't write this week's post at all due to burnout.
You might be able to relate, burnout is by far the biggest issue my ADHD causes me. It's what led to me even getting assessed at 30 in the first place.
You probably share my brain's need to want to do everything at once, but are not actually able to do more than one thing fully, as a neurotypical person can. We're either 1000% or 0%…there is no middle ground.
When I look back on my life, I realise I've always done this…
2-6 months of high performance. An obsession, unable to be fully present or interested in anything else properly other than this thing (work mostly, but could be anything)
Usually driven by chasing something (a promotion, impressing a new client, a financial goal - whatever) or just due to the pressure or stress. Followed by a crash (the burnout cycle).
Since having my first child almost 4 years ago and then starting a business shortly after, the cycle and intensity have been much more intense. Driven by ambition, but also the pressure of the nature of entrepreneurship and being a parent - neither of which I'm complaining about, I love every part of it.
Each burnout felt worse. After researching it and actually realising it was burnout (and realising the other ADHD traits I had) I got the diagnosis.
I went away for the weekend with my wife, recharged and started the meds. I then had one of the most productive periods for a while, grinding right up to the day before I was due to fly to Dubai with my wife - a trip to celebrate 3 years in business and my 30th.
The morning of the flight, it got cancelled due to the situation in Iran. Straight back to the grind, no reset. Then sold my flat and bought a new home (and dealt with the stress of that) and crashed worse than ever before, after finishing it all.
I think largely because my mind was anticipating the trip (going away and switching off seems to be the only thing that I've found helps, but it's obviously not an easy solution, nor is it perfect) and it didn't happen, I just landed back into the cycle, prematurely.
Again, this might be something you've faced. Because I know there is a reason and that I AM burning out (before I didn't know what it was), and now it's visible, like with other ADHD traits, it feels x100 worse. So, combined with the no-break, this one has been huge.
I want to focus more on burnouts in these posts, my journey and how I (hopefully) learn to manage it. I'm sure you might have/had issues with this very thing, so we can figure it out together.
Right now I'm trying to figure out how to actually run at 80% - no idea how yet, but I'll report back as I work it out.
Have you found a way to consistently be 80% with life, rather than 100% or 0%?
Have a good weekend!
Alex